ChaCha--Human-powered Search Engine Or Phone Sex????

Hello, my name is Chris. [Hello, Chris!] I am a ChaCha guide and I am ashamed.

I will tell you, straight up, that I am ashamed. I am ashamed of the fact that for the past year I have been willing to work so hard for so little money (most ChaCha guides makes less than $2.50 per hour). I am ashamed that I have been willing to take abuse from the thousands of pranksters, hecklers and crackpots who call in every day to wish me a heartfelt "Fuck you!" or ask me insane and predictable questions. (If I answer one more question about the average penis size, I will scream. It is 5 1/2", for God's sake!)

I am ashamed of the demeaning demands that ChaCha puts on their 'contract workers' to meet quotas and maintain a certain level of 'quality' in their answers lest they see their salaries slashed in half (each week ChaCha's so-called 'quality control' staff can cut a guide's pay down from 20 cents to 10 cents per search without any explanation of what the guide did wrong). But mostly I am ashamed that this is the best job I can get right now.

90% of the questions are from teenagers, boys, mostly, wanting to know everything about sex. What does a vagina look like? Feel like? Smell like? What is the average size of a penis? What about a black guy's penis? An asian penis? A white penis? How much masturbation is too much? Too little? Can you break it (your penis) or otherwise hurt it by going at it too briskly? Is there any way (Oh, God, let there be a way!) that you can enlarge it?

Knowing that most of these Infoseekers are somebody's kid, I usually give bland definitions that anyone can look up in a dictionary (vagina: a part of the female's reproductive system) or I feign ignorance ('How do I know if I am horny?' My answer: 'Feel the top of your head.')

But parents beware! Even though many of the questions are just plain filthy, ChaCha guides are encouraged to answer the sex questions graphically lest the 'quality' of their answer be deemed 'inaccurate' by QC.

In the Guide Forum recently, a new guide, who had been critized by QC for providing an inaccurate answer, ask the forum moderators to explain how she should have answered the following question.

Infoseeker question: "How do I pleasure a girl orally."

The guide, who had felt uncomfortable giving sex instruction to a possible minor, had texted back, "I do not feel qualified to give advice on this subject. Please consult your doctor or a sex therapist." A nice response, I thought, but Quality Control didn't agree and now the new guide has a black mark against her record and will most likely see her salary cut .

And how did the forum moderator tell her to answer a similar question next time? She said (warning: this is very explicit!) "You should have told the Infoseeker that oral sex involves licking, sucking and kissing the v..." (The moderator got even more graphic than that, but I just can't go on.)

I'm sorry, ChaCha, this is where I draw the line. I have morals and I refuse, I absolutely refuse to be some kid's sex teacher. Instead, I will continue to point the infoseeker to a reputable website where they can seek out the answers for themselves.

At some point, ChaCha is going to have to decide if it wants to be taken seriously as a legitimate internet search company, or if it is willing to settle for being a sleazy portal where kids can get free sex advice without their parents knowing about it. Either way, I will not sell my soul for 10 cents.

Next time...ChaCha guides are encouraged to snitch...on each other!